On the 20-year anniversary of the fiery end of the government's standoff with Branch Davidian members in Waco, Texas, a family member of one of the victims has recalled desperately watching the blaze on television, not knowing whether his relative was safe.
'I felt so disempowered, being so far away,' Lloyd Hardial, whose sister Sandra died in the fire, told the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. 'The second thing I felt was shock. The way the fire rapidly engulfed the compound, it was clear there were going to be casualties. Against all odds, my hope was that somehow she managed to scramble away.'
He later learned that his sister had in fact died in the fire, which was ignited by Branch Davidians at the end of a 51-day standoff with ATF agents that had begun in February of 1993.
Gruesome anniversary: It's been 20 years since the fire that ended a 51-day standoff between federal agents and the heavily armed Branch Davidian cultists
In charge: Branch Davidian leader David Koresh was accused of child abuse and statutory rape
Hardial, from Manchester, England, told the newspaper that to this day, he doesn't understand how his sister became a follower of the cult's leader, David Koresh.
He said she was a Seventh Day Adventist and heard Koresh preach during his recruiting trips to England in the late 1980s. Afterwards, she made a two-week pilgrimmage to the U.S. to learn more about him and then returned in 1992.
Her family learned she had returned a second time when she didn't show up for a vacation they had planned together.
'Once we got back to the U.K., she had left us a letter, explaining she was back in Waco, and she felt there was more work to do in terms of understanding the scripture,' Hardial told the Star-Telegram. 'She left a phone number and she would ring fairly often. ... She had a sizable amount of savings that had not been touched, and we felt she would come back when the time was right.
Controversy: The standoff cast an international spotlight on Waco and Central Texas, as well as the ATF, which was criticized in a later government review for not calling off the raid after sect members discovered the plan
'In our telephone conversations, she never sounded disturbed,' he said. 'Nothing in her speech suggested she was being coached. She sounded her normal self.'
He later learned that she died of smoke inhalation from the fire that ended the ATF standoff on April 19, 1993 and that there were traces of cyanide in her gall bladder.
She was one of seventy-four people who died in the blaze, inlcuding two dozen children.
Trying to make sense of what happened to his sister, Hardial opined, 'I think religion is a dual-edged sword. It brings out the best in some, and the worst in others. People can be taken in by individuals like Koresh. There is a certain charm, a certain charisma that people will fall for hook, line and sinker.'
Before the fall: David Koresh was known as Vernon Wayne Howell before taking over the Branch Davidians as a self-proclaimed prophet, pictured here with wife Rachel, and their son Cyrus in front of their house
Invasion: Some saw the raid as an unwarranted government intrusion into personal and religious freedoms, and Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh would later say his motivation was revenge for Waco