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Gove is a confident piece of work, a minister in his pomp

Blackout in the Commons. It happened just after Education Secretary Michael Gove described a school in Vauxhall, south London, as ‘a bright ray of hope’. With that, ping, off went the lights.

But for ghostly illumination through the Chamber’s clerestory windows (which have opaque glass, like a public lavatory) it remained dark for a second or two. Briefly I wondered if my eyes were going wrong. Too much H&E magazine as a teenager, perhaps.

Mr Gove stopped mid-sentence and reacted, as PG Wodehouse once put it, with: ‘??’ Hon Members: ‘????’ Even the Speaker had nothing to say for himself. That doesn’t often happen.

Blackout in the Commons: The lights switched off in the Commons just after Education Secretary Michael Gove described a school in Vauxhall, south London, as 'a bright ray of hope'

Had someone accidentally leaned an elbow against the light switch, perhaps while chatting up some young researcher and hoping to look debonair? Had an eco-warrior invaded the premises and plunged the House into darkness to make an eloquent plea for our politicians to expend less hot air?

Actually it just seems to have been a minor fusebox explosion – neighbouring Portcullis House, where several MPs have offices, was worse affected – and the lights were soon back on, albeit on dimmer wattage than normal. After another minute everything was back to normal.

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Mr Gove quickly recovered himself, quoting Cardinal Newman’s ‘lead, kindly light, amid the encircling gloom’.

The Education Secretary is a confident piece of work in the Chamber these days, a minister in his pomp. First he ladles the consensual stuff, pouring praise on the occasional backbench Labour MP who publicly agrees with him (the backbenchers rather like this) and alluding to his respect for some of Tony Blair’s academy school reforms (special mention, usually, of Lord Adonis). 

Labour's Helen Goodman was very much agin kiddies being pushed too hard and was even opposed to them being at school aged six

Then, at the slightest provocation, the same Mr Gove biffs Labour for being dinosaurs and wanting to go back to the bad old days, keep the ill-educated under their thumbs, etc, etc. Labour’s moth-eaten frontbenchers find this immensely irritating – but also perhaps worry that it might be true.

Shadow Education Secretary Stephen Twigg, after all, used to be a prominent Blairite but has had to swallow his past, like a persecuted Christian eating his missal. Mr Twigg now presents himself as a disciple of Ed Balls. Oh, tricky, tricky times for the Comrades.

David Ruffley (Con, Bury St Edmunds) transported us to higher things. He endorsed an idea that school children be made to learn poetry. He started quoting some (prose) remarks by Ted Hughes that the poetry of Robert Frost and TS Eliot could be ‘a great sheet anchor of sensibility’. Labour MPs noticed that Mr Ruffley was reading these comments. They felt he should have learned them by heart. Laughter. Squeaker Bercow, who bridles when he sees any MP gaining too much attention, barged into the matter to grab some glory for himself. Mr Ruffley shrugged off Mr Bercow’s unnecessary intervention and said that Labour were ‘the enemies of rigour’ in seeming to oppose the learning of verse. ‘There is a role for rote learning in the schools of tomorrow,’ cried Mr Ruffley, his anger flaring.

In effect, the Tories want youngsters to work harder, but not all Opposition MPs agreed. Helen Goodman (Lab, Bishop Auckland), for instance, was very much agin kiddies being pushed too hard and was even opposed to them being at school aged six.

Various Leftists wanted more ‘sex and relationship’ education in schools. Oh, spare us. Telly historian Tristram Hunt, newly appointed to the Labour frontbench, claimed that his party ‘believes in academic excellence’ but with the likes of Miss Goodman honking away, that position may not be entirely convincing.

Of Lady Hodge (Lab, Barking) there was no sign. Her ladyship yesterday vouchsafed an interview to Another Newspaper in which she said that MPs should attend Westminster more weeks in the year. This is self-polishing tosh. Do they not do quite enough damage as it is? For centuries, bureaucrats and meddlers have responded to decline with the cry that ‘more bureaucracy and more meddling’ is needed. The very opposite is more likely to be true.

 


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